Sharing is caring...except when it's about unasked for training advice

I am a self proclaimed student of marathon running…I read books, I spend my days at the office listening to podcasts on marathon running, I read articles and scour all online sources for any little tidbit of data that will make me a better runner. I ask questions of anyone that I know that is faster than I am or has completed races that I hope to complete. I look for that person that is where I want to be with running and I learn about them and from them. That being said, I admit that I get frustrated when I am given unsolicited advice on training.

Regina inquired about my long run over the weekend, I replied that we did a little over 10 but walked a bit more than either one of us would have liked. To which a fellow classmate decided to provide me with her take on how walking will improve my marathon and that I need to work on increasing my walking speed. I politely explained that I need to increase my running speed, not my walking speed as the pace we completed on training on Saturday would not get us to the Bridge in time.  Unfortunately she was insistent that working on walking speed would help with my running speed. I was trying to be polite and not blow her off, especially since initially I felt as if her intentions were good. However, I became increasingly frustrated that she chose not to listen to what my goals/needs/desires were and instead focused on walking.

I don’t dismiss walking as a key part of a marathon…I have walked more than half of the last two I have completed….which is EXACTLY why I need to work on my running speed. My strength training. My stretching. My mental game. These are a few key factors that I need to work on to achieve my goal. I think what frustrated me was the assumptions made about me and my talents/abilities without asking.

I admittedly made assumptions about her talents and abilities based not on her age or her appearance but on the amount of grumbling she does about exercises we do. Personally, I assume if you regularly grumble about the number of lunges you have to do that you aren’t going to have a desire to push yourself to complete a marathon with a serious goal in mind. Also, if you don’t let me finish my sentence when explaining why walking isn’t the goal I’m personally going for, I’m not going to listen.  

 I  guess I need to remember that not everyone has the same thought process as me…that it is better to inquiry about the persons training plan and learn what works for them. And if the conversation warrants it, then share your training plan not as a “this plan is the end all be all” but more in terms of a “hey we’re both doing this whacky crazy thing, here’s what works for me” exchange of ideas.

 

 

 

 

Making Memories That Are More Important Than Running

Last night Jesi and I traveled to a Group Mission Workcamp Site in Pennsylvania in order to surprise her Dad for his 50th birthday. I will admit I was a bit bummed that I would be missing my training run since I've finally found a training rhythm, but sometimes there are things in life that are more important than training runs.

I lost my Daddy about two years after his 50th, it was sudden and shocking but at the same time I didn't grasp the far reaching impact of his loss. I was 18 years old and so overwhelmed with decisions and choices that instantly ended my childhood and made me an adult that I didn't really have time to think about anything. It wasn't until I continued to grow and age and have those important milestones that I truly grasped what that loss has meant to the overall picture of my life.

While Jesi kept thanking me for driving five hours round trip, missing my training run, staying up until 2:30 in the morning all so that we could spend a few hours to surprise her Dad; all I could think about was that I needed to make sure that she has as all the chances to do stuff like that. It's not a poor pity me, but more a desire to ensure that no opportunity is lost to make a special memory.

Training is important, critically important if I plan on meeting and exceeding my goals....but it's the memories of the people and those that we love that will last larger than finishing times and whether or not I got my Wednesday night run in.

Avoiding the Negative

Running effortlessly. Where everything falls into place. Your breath is perfectly timed to your foot fall. Your feet are softly touching the ground but have immense power to propel you forward with the lightest of touches. It’s a perfect moment in a runner’s day. That moment where everything is literally perfect. Seemingly effortless because it truly feels effortless.

 I had that feeling for a brief fleeting moment on Tuesday. Where I thought for a moment this is what the greats feel like. I am one of the greats. And then, my moment was shattered by a fellow classmate who snapped “JJ she said run to the yellow sign, not sprint.” Thankfully Regina spoke up and told me to do my thing.  

I honestly didn’t realize I was sprinting, to me I was just enjoying the feel and the moment and the energy of that fleetingly perfect moment. I was thinking about how this training session was going to make me a better runner. I was thinking about my footfall and how it was touching so softly, not that clodhopper like sound they make when I am tired and dragging. I was feeling the mechanics of my body and making those unconscious adjustments.

I will admit that I have been struggling with my reaction since Tuesday. In an instant, I had allowed someone’s negative, snarky really, comment to take away the awesome feeling that I was having. I was frustrated by her intrusion in my moment. Embarrassed that my hard work and effort were being belittled.

I appreciated Regina coming to my defense, but I spent the remaining time in class stuck in my head, and the thoughts of that morning still continue to pop in and out of thoughts. In an instant, I was left feeling like the odd person out. It is a lonely feeling, to feel as if you are the only one pushing and striving for something beyond the comfort zone. Reaching for something bigger than yourself. Reaching for something that just seems ever so slightly out of reach, but yet you know that if you keep going, keep pushing you will get it.

 I am not intimating that my fellow classmates are lazy or lack drive, we are all there at 6am when one could be sleeping in, but I feel that our goals, our DESIRES are different. In that difference is the basis for the snappy comment. The jab at me as a person. Me as an athlete. Me as a dreamer. Me as goal chaser.

 Andy Frisella talks about the concept of haters in one of his recent podcasts. It's such a common turn of phrase in modern lexicon that I must admit I was quick to use on my classmate. However, she wasn't a hater, she wasn't offering constructive criticism but she wasn't a hater. She just lacked understanding of who I am as a person.

And going beyond her lack of understanding of me as a person and taking myself out of the equation all together, the statement was more about her. She was stating something about something she is personally battling, something that was unsettling inside herself.

Though the larger philosophical part of me is trying to continue to hold that thought in my mind, it still bothers me that I allowed someone else’s negativity to impact my run. It is honestly something that I struggle with on a daily basis in my non-running life. Hopefully with time and practice, I will figure out how to discard/ignore those negative thoughts and vibes and just focus on that effortless feeling.

 

Day Two...here Wii go

The morning started out promising, I spent the morning running about a mile and change while stopping to take part in various cardio like torture at the direction of my trainer Regina. The five person boot camp ventured out and around running and exercising, laughing and getting to know each other as we began on our day by with an outdoor 6am exercise routine in August like temperatures and humidity.

Three miles was on par of the day. I prefer not to break my miles up, but was going to get at least two miles in after work with a goal of actually shooting for three consistent steady miles. Alas, Mother Nature decided to blanket us with torrential downpours, thunder, lightening and a myriad of warnings that caused me to make alternate plans.

The Wii....the island lap (the longest of the "runs") is roughly a mile....I did two island laps and a short lap just for good measure. Not exactly the run I wanted but I had to keep moving. I knew that if I didn't find some way to create the miles I would frustrated before I even began. On the upside, Wii Fit Island is a pretty fun place to visit everyone is friendly and waves and the dogs, though unleashed, are friendly and don't pester you.

My wife so kindly asked why I didn't just go to the gym and run on the treadmill...honestly by the time I realized that I couldn't run I also didn't want to venture out and drive back across town through roads that often flood, so improvisation came into play.

I wouldn't recommend Wii Fit as an all the time alternative, if only because it will leave a bald spot in my carpet, but as a last resort to keep the momentum going it's the perfect solution. Some kind of movement is better than none at all.

Why me? A pep talk to myself.

Why me?

 

It’s an understandable question; one that I took a few minutes to ponder while sitting in an all too familiar waiting room. The lab request form in my hand and my sleeve rolled up, waiting for the all too familiar battery of tests. Nearly two decades later, two decades, and the feelings of frustration, fear and anger seem to surface pretty easily.

 

I was beginning to think that finally my body, the organism that had been attacking me for a majority of my life, had finally given up its struggle and allowed me to declare victory. I run for fun, I roll through mud for fun, granted it’s under barbed wire with people yelling at me to go faster, I scale walls for fun. I’m a four time marathon finisher, five time half marathon finisher. I’m a Spartan!

 

December 30, 2013 found me sitting in an all too familiar waiting room, of an all too familiar lab. The décor may have changed but not really. It’s still sterile. Cold. Uncomfortable. The following day found me ringing in the New Year with a new diagnosis.

 

Hypothyroidism.

 

Seriously?! I’m a marathoner and a Spartan! Who currently is not allowed to marathon or Spartan.

 

My lab results revealed levels that were out of range by over 400%. A figure that didn't get there overnight, but the symptoms, looking back, that started about a year ago always had a logical reason; they seemed to fall in line with my training schedule. I merely chalked the fatigue up to training harder for my races combined with the fatigue that has plagued me since my bout of hyperthyroidism as a teen.  While I was "thrilled" (so to speak) to finally have a diagnosis and a name to put on what had becoming overwhelming fatigue (a phrase that doesn't properly explain the depth of my exhaustion), along with a host of other symptoms….I was disheartened when I realized that for the time being I am unable to train.

 

For the last few weeks I have been silently, longingly, looking at my social media feeds, watching everyone’s gym stories, their below freezing runs and their various accomplishments scroll by me. I don’t begrudge my fellow Spartans and other racers their gym time, I just wish I was able to take part.

 

It’s hard. It’s frustrating.

 

Why me? A question that has been rambling around for awhile. Until I get a response, somewhere deep in the back of my brain.

 

Why not me?

 

I am after all a marathoning Spartan. It’s not as if I haven’t been there, done this before. The symptoms and name might be different but the impact is the same. Besides, a quick Google search of athletes and hypothyroidism yields a list of Olympic athletes that I feel honored to be among. Perhaps this just means I have become such a beast at the gym that my body can’t handle ME.

 

I will admit that it’s not all sunshine and sprinkles’ raining down on a herd of unicorns, but it’s something that I can do. Do I want to do it, not especially. But I will.

 

Why me?

 

Because. I am a marathoner. I am a Spartan. I can do anything. And I will…..after I take a nap and my pill. Until then, I will continue to stare longingly at my friends who are training and preparing for races and competitions and remind myself, that I can do this, again.

 

 

 

 

A Belated New Year's Resolution

As a new year’s resolution I vowed that I would write/journal/blog every day. While I wrote in my nice little journal everyday…..for about a week, I seemed to have abandoned my blog lately. It was originally intended to track my journey as I prepared for my first marathon. Even during that process I was lax in my writing.

As the weather has turned even nicer than the unseasonable warm winter we have had in Maryland, I have found myself running and training more. With that increased time on my feet has come an increase in my internal mumblings that I have felt more compelled to jot down as of late.

After watching Spirit of the Marathon, a really amazing 2007 documentary that was gifted to me last year as a “must watch” while prepping for my marathon…..I must admit that I didn’t watch it until last week, I was inspired. And as a result, my focus and drive was kick started. I want to ensure that I am properly prepared for this year’s Marine Corps Marathon.

While going through the Hal Higdon running plan that will in 18 weeks prep me for my second marathon, I realized how unprepared I really was last year. Due to injuries I was really sidelined in training….honestly it’s kind of a miracle that I was able to complete the marathon when I take into account my overall lack of mileage and long distance running prior to race day.

So I have decided to rectify that this year by ensuring that I take a focused, well planned and injury free approach to training. Along with that process will hopefully be more blog posts with thoughts about training, life, mud runs, strange toe nail issues and not getting smushed by a car….a task that proves challenging when living in the while trying to train for marathons.

This post, while not especially exciting or long winded as previous posts, will kick off my 2012 blogging attempt. Lets hope this year is better then last, with more posts and fewer injuries. Cheers!

PS Due to a less than positive experience with champagne, none was consumed in the writing of this blog....though you are welcome to imbibe to help me start off my belated New Year.